Learn techniques that give a whole new meaning to ”the law of attraction”

Did you know 1 in 5 relationships begin online? You’ve heard this on television, it’s Match.com’s claim to fame. And it’s true that an entire industry has developed and online dating has picked up tons of traction in the last decade. But let’s be honest. It’s entirely more comfortable to ‘wink’ or ‘flirt’ online or through a chat window. Think about what you’ve emailed someone or tweeted or posted on Facebook because no one is really ‘around’ for you to see how they react? You can let your hair down and hold your breath while you push the ‘send’ button to see what everyone says! We’ve all been there. You see that they’re typing something in return, that they’ve entered text, now there’s a huge pause….”Why aren’t they writing anything back???!” and finally, FINALLY, a response comes through and they like what you said or suggested! It’s absolutely thrilling!

If only you could do this in person and get the same acceptance in ‘real’ life like you can online. If only you could go through life with a paper bag on your head. It’s fine, we’ve all thought about it. Maybe seriously… But anyone can text, IM, send an email or carry on ’flirting’ behind a veil that is the Internet.  In society, it’s the face to face confrontations that are hardest to prepare for. So what do you do when you’re in person? How do you get the attention of someone across the room? What about that important first meeting after all the online chit chat has actually led somewhere?  There isn’t a screen you can hide behind. So…it comes down to good old fashion flirting! And maybe just some common sense.

There are more ways than typical to drop hints to a potential mate. It’s just that sometimes, when you do what you think are all the right romantic things, you could look too eager to please which gets interpreted as if you don’t have the confidence to back it up.

1. Keep it real.

Life it too short to surround yourself with anyone that doesn’t absolutely make you feel worth it, make you feel special, like you’re worth their time and energy and make you feel like you can be yourself. Make sure at the end of the day, when you’re all by yourself and you look in the mirror, you like what you see. Have enough confidence on the inside and the rest will fall into place. Now that’s sexy!

2. Do what you have to do to make YOU feel good.

If working out before a first date makes you feel thinner in those jeans, you need to work out.  You’re worth the time or schedule adjustment to make it happen. You can say no to a friend or co worker if it means you’ll have the time to do what you need to do to feel ready and not rushed. You’ll feel more attractive and that will radiate and be more natural if you really feel it on the inside. But you can’t feel it on the inside if you’re not taking the time or doing enough for you personally, to feel good. You can apply this to dating and to real life. It’s okay to find a balance between giving and receiving your time and your energy.

3. Hold a gaze.

Don’t be the creepy dude at the end of the bar. But this is good technique and if someone catches your eye and you’re like “woah!”, be the last one to look away. Don’t stare. There’s a critical difference. And you might want to practice this one. Girls know when a guy has noticed them. So do just that. Take notice, look away. Take notice, look away. And see if you just happen to wind up in the same place at the same time later that night!

4. Get active.

There’s nothing like some healthy competition to get the adrenaline pumping. Consider joining a co-ed soccer, flag football, floor hockey, volleyball or softball league. Grab a friend and see who you meet. A lot of times, people hang out after the game so it’s a great, casual way to get to know somebody better. The ice is already broken – you just hung out for an hour! And you have that to talk about or reference. People sweat, they strike out, they get dirty. So get out there and play with reckless abandon. What’s the saying…”People who play together stay together.”

5. Ask Questions.

But let the person answer before you ask another question. I like this technique because it puts the onus on the other person to do the majority of the talking. If you’re not sure what to say, just ask a question. Be spontaneous; ask questions perhaps based on the person’s answers. It’s nothing you can really prepare for. i.e. Don’t write them down and whip out a sheet of paper mid-flirt. Be genuinely inquisitive and respectful of their response. Avoid interrupting and owning the spotlight. It’s amazing when you sit back and just let a person have the glory.

Other helpful Tips that may be worth a shot.

Wear or carry something that is eye-catching and noticeable. Thank goodness for apliques! You will be surprised how much easier it is to make good eye contact if you glisten. See Tip 3.

Wear a perfume or cologne that you can pronounce. In case someone asks, you don’t want to say you don’t know or pronounce it incorrectly. That will just look like you’re trying too hard.

Put the cell phone down. Make a big deal or noticeable effort to finish up whatever it is you’re doing when a person approaches you or starts a conversation,  i.e. put your phone in your pocket and completely out of sight. This makes a person feel special and if they abide by Tip 1. then you would qualify for their time and energy.