I don’t know when it happened, but gone are the days of roaming the neighborhood in your Freddy Krueger costume – your path lit only by the moonlight and the faint glow of carved jack-o-lanterns (evidently, too many creepy guys in white conversion vans have ruined this time-honored tradition). Instead, kids of all ages are reduced to being on one end of the sun-drenched “door-to-door solicitation of candy” – we now call, Halloween! How in drac’s pajamas does a child learn about the adrenaline rush he gets when his big sister jumps out of the bushes just as a woman in a witch costume opens the front door?
It’s time to take matters into your own hands! The word on the street may be that your neighbors are giving out full-size candy bars (for the record: “Fun Size” = Not-So-Fun), but don’t let TREATS get all the play this Halloween. Rebel against the establishment! This year, instead of sitting in front of the TV to watch whichever watered-down “film” the sugary networks showcase for your mild amusement, take the kiddies on a new Halloween haunt: TRICKS. “Tricks” are the red-headed stepchild of Halloween. They get a mention, but rarely any action. Move over Ashton, there’s a new sheriff in town!
Ding Dong Ditch
Long after the last ghost/goblin/fairy princess has left the scene of the crime, you ring the doorbell and run as fast as you possibly can out of sight. Meanwhile, your friends maintain quiet composure (yeah right!) in the bushes even after your “victim” answers the door and yells voracious obscenities. This activity promises to deliver hours of enjoyment that will last well into the witching hour!
Decoy
Dear ol’ Dad is perfect for this little prank. Dress him up in a costume with a hat (any will do) and add straw pieces out of the sleeves, pant legs, and neckline. Have him sit at a high foot-traffic (albeit unassuming) area – COMPLETELY STILL. Wait for a few passer-bys to walk through, and then have Dad jump out to startle the “victim”. Those walking by think that Dad is a dapperly dressed scarecrow, when in reality he intends to scare the daylights out of them – MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
TeePeeing
Economical. Recyclable. Team Work. At least, this is the way we are going to look at things. What other fun could you have with 100 rolls of 1000-sheet toilet paper, mom’s mini-van, and a black ski mask? Toilet Papering a house is the best prank EVER for one simple reason: It is the trick that keeps on treating! Wake up early the next morning to watch the “victim” clean-up.
I KNOW, I know. This list is based in an alternate reality. A time and place when and where there were no soccer moms to interfere with harmless fun and frolic. Police cars dimmed the headlights and averted their eyes from innocent precociousness. But if you still live in a neighborhood that offers this kind of freedom (and some of you still do), rejoice in all the joys that the holiday can bring. For those of you that don’t, please read our disclaimer:
Note: The pranks listed in this article are for entertainment purposes only. Some may be harmful to others or illegal and we do not support that type of behavior. We take no responsibility for anyone getting into trouble or causing any harm due to our random musings.